Friday, May 31, 2013

Good days / Bad days

Staying home full-time has its good days and bad days. This week has run the gamut from an amazing day where I felt like supermom to an is-it-time-for-bed yet? day when just making it through felt like a victory. Yesterday was the latter. Last night I spent some time thinking about what makes for a "good day" and a "bad day" to determine how I can more frequently have the former.  

On good days I...
  • Socialize with other adults
  • Exercise, even if it is just our morning walk around the neighborhood
  • Eat well
  • Read
  • Keep the house (relatively) tidy
  • Complete one "big" task (laundry, cleaning the bathrooms, organizing files, etc.)
  • Write
On bad days I...
  • Obsessively check Facebook, blogs, or email
  • Use the computer before HP's first nap
  • Frequently use the computer while HP's awake
  • Binge on sugar or other junk food
I have no illusions that I will be able to avoid everything on the "bad day" list and always implement everything on the "good day" list. I won't. Some days I just need to eat ice cream and watch awful reality television during nap time. Does it make me happy in the long run? Nope. Does it help me get through the day? Sure does.

What I can do is stop myself from engaging in the activities from the "bad day" list for no real reason. When HP goes down for his nap I get in the habit of pulling out the computer and mindlessly surfing the internet for an hour. I am not knocking computers or the internet--I love both!--but they are best used as a tool, not a time-filler. If I am not careful I let them suck me into their orbit even when I would be happier reading, writing, or crossing something off my to-do list.

I tried to work on making good decisions with my time back in February, but I still have a long way to go. Last night, I came across a quote about parenting while reading Carry On, Warrior that was just what I needed to hear:
We have to show them how it's done. We need to love ourselves if we want our kids to love themselves. We don't necessarily have to love them more; we have to love ourselves more. We have to be gentle with ourselves. We have to forgive ourselves and then... oh my goodness... find ourselves sort of awesome, actually, considering the freaking circumstances. p. 119
Each day I strive to spend my time productively and wisely, but as often as not I fail to live up to the standard I set for myself. As HP edges toward toddlerhood he regularly test my patience, parenting, and sanity, which makes it so much more appealing to eat ice cream and scan Facebook than to wash dishes and straighten the house.

But if I step back and think about our life as a whole, the balance between good days and bad days is about 50-50. And considering the freaking circumstances? I'd say we're doing all right.

2 comments:

  1. Yes! Considering the freaking circumstances I think we're all doing okay.

    That picture of HP is priceless. He looks so much like you and so much like Henry all at once.

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    1. Thanks! I can't decide who he looks most like. Last night Henry rigged up some cardboard that prevents him from standing while in his chair. As you can see, he had no remorse for his transgression...

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