A few months ago I wrote about how I want to savor each stage of HP's childhood. And it's true--I do. He changes every single day, whether I am watching or not. He flies through stages--both good and bad--leaving me little time to reorient myself to his newest accomplishments, likes, and dislikes before they are old news. Children do not wait for their parents to stop being busy before changing, so taking the time to soak in who they are right now is a worthy goal.
This morning Katie at Loves of Life posted a link to the article To Parents of Small Children: Let me be the one who says it out loud. My favorite part? Where the author talks about wanting to hold people under water who tell him to "Enjoy every moment now! They grow up so fast!" He doesn't want to hold them under until they drown, of course, "Just for a minute or so. Just until they panic a little."
If you were to look in my house yesterday afternoon you would not have found me "savoring the stage," "enjoying the moment," or "soaking it all in." Nope. You would have found me exhausted from lack of sleep, curled up on the chair in the corner of the room, eating brownies with abandon, praying HP would be content to entertain himself for the next two hours until Henry got home, because in that moment, I could not find it within myself to be an engaged parent.
I wish I could say that the scene I just described was an anomaly, but that would be a lie. Parenting is hard, exhausting work, that in my case, is often done on little to no sleep. I am not going to enjoy every minute of my child's life, no matter how fast it is speeding by.
And that's okay.
*Update* Please go read this post that Abby mentioned in the comments. Glennon beautifully (and humorously) speaks of the frustration she feel when told to "carpe diem" by well-meaning strangers.